is your mom at the bar?
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize