it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize