No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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