Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i barfeds in our rink
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
