yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Randomize