Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
