Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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