I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Randomize
