i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
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