pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
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