you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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