spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
operation have a gay friend backfired
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
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