this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize