hotel room ftw
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
