Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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