It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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