after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Randomize
