Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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