Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
My dick has a subreddit
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
