Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
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