he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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