yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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