Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
