question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
