everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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