EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
