He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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