cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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