I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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