I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
