I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize