you win again, gameday.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize
