Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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