she woke up with a sticky ear
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
