and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
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