WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
