Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
