we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Randomize
