party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
it glows. i had to have it.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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