Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
