Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Randomize
