quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Randomize
