and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
The convent might be a nice break from real life
The Olympian is in my bed
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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