"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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