I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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