Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
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