Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Randomize