I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
