even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
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