sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
