just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
You can't just leave with hair like that
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
